The Deer, Deer, Deer, Deer!
Tonight, we stopped by the local rapid sustenance dispenser to acquire some delectable fodder.
After thirty minutes of not moving, we decided to exit the line. The boys needed to be in bed. They didn’t take a nap today. After hearing Son #2 say, “Drive, Dada!” for the eleven hundredth time, and after explaining just as many times that I was waiting in a long line for his food, it was time to go.
I’ve never been remotely close to hitting a deer with a car. Living in a rural area, you would think that near-deer experiences would be more common. Maybe it’s because I don’t get out much.
But since we were out tonight, and since it’s deer season, tonight was a prime opportunity to hunt via high-speed SUV.
Also, today, we switched car insurance. We no longer employ the services of a Gecko. We opted for an insurance company whose prices are much less for the same amount of coverage.
As we meandered along the rural road toward home, I contemplated the splitting of the atom, the beauty of the Blue Ridge mountains, the cost of groceries, and the rise and fall of the Achaemenid Empire.
My eyes were on the road ahead. Really. My side of the road. I was not focused on what was on the oncoming traffic side of the road.
Why? Because there was no oncoming traffic. Why would I focus on darkness?
Thankfully, Charity has night vision. All of a sudden, I hear, “Deer deer deer DEER DEER DEER!!” It was almost melodic. And it was amazingly rhythmic. Charity busted out her rap alter ego to give us a rendition of a brand-new song she made up on the fly.
A large deer rear quarter panel came into my line of sight.
I slammed on the brakes, and Charity held her hand up, palm facing outward. She also pushed it forward with a motion simulating a rapid-fire high five to the open air.
And to be completely honest, if it hadn’t been for her hand up in the air, I don’t know if our brakes could have handled it.
The wind resistance against her hand was what saved us, no doubt about it.
And I, for one, am thankful. I can’t imagine submitting a claim to insurance on the first day we bought coverage from them.
We started home again. There was laughter coming from the back seats.
“Hey, Daddy, do that again!”
“Maybe we’ll have the chance again when Mommy isn’t in the car.”
to the passengers,
- Caleb